AVENGERS FACILITY, UPSTATE NY—Steve Rogers, better known as Captain America, passed an Infinity Stone through his urethra Friday, Nick Fury reported. According to Fury, the stone in question was the Soul Stone, one of the …
SURREY, UK—Gordon Sumner, better known as Sting, has been stalking his former girlfriend after having been told to buzz off, according to a court report. The report states that Sting, the former lead singer of …
NEW YORK—The History Channel venerated the ending of the network’s actual history programming in a ceremony Wednesday. The somber event was attended by the stars of History’s current lineup of popular-but-not-history-related reality and dramatic shows. …
TUNICA, MS—Kenny Rogers decided he knew when to walk away from a Texas Hold’Em tournament at the Horseshoe Casino, a spokesman for the casino reported. After building an early chip lead, Rogers had been roasted …
LAS VEGAS, NV—Jesus is answering prayers today, the Associated Press reported, citing first-hand accounts that Christ made it rain in drought-stricken South Sudan, as well as in Sweat, an exclusive Las Vegas club. Officials have reported …
HOLLYWOOD, CA—”Remember Me,” the Academy Award winning song from Pixar’s 2017 film Coco was inspired by an email login screen, reports Robert Lopez, co-writer of the song. “One day I was trying to login to my …
LOS ANGELES—William Drayton Jr, better known as Flavor Flav, showed up an hour late for a scheduled taping of an episode of his reality dating game show Flavor of Love on Sunday, March 11. The …
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